Light

One of my favorite topics to read or write about is the concept of ‘light’ and ‘darkness’. It creates a stunning visual in my mind, and I can relate it to many aspects of my interests such as Jungean Psychology, art, spirituality, mysticism, theology, and Christianity. 

I don’t know if it is my love of nuance or a desire to read between the lines, but I always find myself going down rabbit holes. When I’m reading scripture, I will be reading along and the next thing I know I’m looking up the Greek translations of words used in verses, and researching what kind of flowers were common during Biblical times that Jesus could have been referring to (even though he said ‘Lilies’, he was actually referring to wildflowers, which were Anemones in case you were curious).

While I am aware that this type of dissection and desire to understand can be a good thing, it is also something that is difficult to manage when it comes to certain aspects of my life.

I can get lost in my mind a lot of the time, which can make it almost impossible to be present and unburdened. 

Not to mention, being what people have called ‘sensitive’, things tend to weigh heavily on me. I (and I’m sure I am not alone in this) want to figure out and understand so many things.

To identify issues and find solutions.

I want to understand why injustice seems to prevail. 

Why do people (including myself) tend to look at things so dualistically? 

Why do people change how they treat you?

Why do I take things so personally sometimes?

Why is my child behaving the way they are?

Why have there been so many loosely translated words in the Bible, when their full original definition changes so much of the actual context and emphasis? 

Why, and I cannot emphasize this enough, WHY are pickles the only things called pickles, when everything else has what their original name was? (Pickled onions, pickled beets, pickled eggs)

Some things are a mystery. Actually, many things are.

I will never fully know or fully understand. And in the grand scheme of things, I don’t know anything, and trying to understand can be mentally and physically exhausting.

I have been trying to think of a word I can focus on for this year, and I decided last night that my word for 2026 will be ‘light’. One of my favorite sayings right now is “Occupation: Aspiring Beam of Light,” and that is what I want to be.

So how does one become a beam of light? Well, I haven’t a clue. I do, however, have some ideas of where to start.

If I want to be a light, I could start by being lighthearted. 

I could let go of the heavy things I carry. 

I could fill myself with all the wonderings that set my soul on fire, and release the things that cast too many shadows.

I could look at the shadows that exist inside of myself and shine a light on them: shame, grief, worry, and fears. 

I can create something from their darkness.

I can watch what the light does to everything.

Light illuminates, reflects, refracts, travels, vibrates, it is both wave and particle. 

Light is active, not passive. It is easy- like a shared yoke, and playful- like a child.

My calling is to be a light. To be lighthearted, and light filled. 

‘Do It Anyway’

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never. between you and them anyway.

a poem by Mother Teresa

It may not make sense in the moment or be easy to understand for you or anyone else- be a light anyway.